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As we travel along the highways and byways of life’s great journey, there are terrible and unmentionable things that once accidentally spotted in the review mirror cannot be unseen. And the grunt and groan of a red-faced cyclist tightly squeezed into an unflattering and unforgiving lycra outfit ranks high on the list of ‘hellish visions which will stalk your nightmares’ list.
Lycra, Spandex, or elastane, call this synthetic material renowned for its exceptional elasticity what you will. I call it a curse and an affront to the dignity of the human race
Lycra clothes the human body like a sausage skin wrapped around offal. It’s durable, stretchable and an unavoidable eye sore in the modern world.
The fierce fetish for lycra and the willingness of relatively sane people to squeeze into a pair of garishly colored shorts, or worse still, a full bodysuit, can be blamed solely on the rise in popularity of cycling.